There's so much pop psychology floating around about finding meaning, being mindful, and the rest of it. This won't cover all the ins and outs, but here's the take that has held up for me.
Hint: maybe the point is to provide meaning.
SMART meaning
Significance
Sort out what is significant from what is merely necessary, short-term or urgent. Meaning isn't found in a checked-off to-do list or bucket list. Those things can help keep us motivated to move down the road, but why are we on the road in the first place?
Spending time thinking about how to measure significance, not just accomplishments — that's smart. Significance looks more like impact, helpfulness, change that can be measured in some way. And as a path to meaning, it's about measuring how much of these things we provide to others, not how much we accumulate for ourselves.
Measure your outflow
There are a few high-brow quotes about what gets measured, but they don't really apply here. What matters is this: we have a choice about what to measure.
In searching for meaning, measure from the inside out. Measure what you're giving, how you're helping, what impact you're having. Maybe the quote we're looking for is the old one about it being more blessed to give than to receive.
Accumulate things that matter
We all acquire and accumulate all kinds of things on life's journey. Too much of it is lying around your space, or taking up room in your head, from the latest fad or fashion trend.
Read through a collection of deathbed quotes sometime, or search for them yourself — there are far too many to list. You won't find any that refer to accumulating more stuff. You will see a lot about relationships, life experiences, and making a contribution.
Recognize regret
Most of us have earned platinum-level frequent flier status taking long trips on the mental plane to Regretville. Maybe we're fellow travelers.
If there's a lesson to learn, let's learn it. Take the lesson and leave the experience behind. Searching for meaning is more fruitful when you're looking proactively rather than reactively. Recognize when regret is detouring you, and decide to go a different way.
Treasure the best things
"Where your treasure is, there will your heart be." Be mindful that what you put value on becomes what your heart is attached to.
Treasure people — long-term friends, shared experiences. Invest your time and money into developing connections, or into cultivating the ability to make connections if that's what you need first.
DUMB ways to search for meaning
Debt
For financial debt from accumulating things that don't matter, see above.
But there's also relational debt from not keeping promises. Emotional debt from letting yourself down. Mental debt from not taking opportunities to learn. Don't take on more debt — start paying it off now.
Unrealistic expectations
More people are confused, dissatisfied, discouraged and disappointed by unrealistic expectations than by almost anything else.
I'm not saying don't shoot for the stars. I'm saying shoot for the stars and don't give up, while also being realistic about what you expect along the way. Plenty of people who've built remarkable things started out acknowledging the odds were against them — and did it anyway, precisely because they weren't expecting it to be easy.
Measuring meaning by comparison
The next time you're tempted not to move forward because of a vague sense of not being good enough, ask yourself: compared to who?
Going one step deeper helps clarify what exactly you're measuring yourself against — and why that should matter.
Being someone other than yourself
It's a common theme, but still true. The world needs the best version of you, not a knock-off copy of someone else.
Lean into your uniqueness. Take an assessment, ask for feedback, discover what makes you different.